Hero Blogger Puts on Festival, Saves Music

Crowds flock to see their hero, the internet blogger

who saved music with one last, big show.

No one saw Sad Moth 2 coming, but it's revelatory significance has already been trumpeted by a legion of music critics.  "History will note that there was music before Sad Moth 2, and there was music after Sad Moth 2," wrote Chuck Klosterman, "nothing will ever be the same."  Pitchfork Music noted, "much like other legendary festivals, such as Woodstock or Woodstock '99, Sad Moth 2 marked a cultural paradigm shift.  We are entering a new epoch; completely uncharted waters.  Sad Moth 2 not only changed music for ever, but it saved it too."

But how did this happen?  The answer lies within the genius of one man.  "You know me, I don't like to toot my own horn or anything," the humble internet blogger who organized Sad Moth 2 opines over martinis during an exclusive interview. "I'll accept the credit if credit is to be given.  But a lot of other great people helped, in minor ways.  Was it my idea? Yes.  Did I plan everything? Yes. Did I run everything? Yes.  But I'm too humble to rest on my laurels. I'm already thinking about next year."

After the immense success of Sad Moth 2, the internet blogger has found it difficult to go out in public without being inundated by autograph seekers, frenzied children, penitent hordes of cultish worshippers and buxom harlots propositioning him for sex.  "I try and not let it get to my head," he says while sipping from a jewel-encrusted chalice gifted to him by the King of Spain.  "I put on my pants one leg at a time just like everyone else, you know."

For those who've been living under a rock the past couple days, Sad Moth 2: Electric Boogaloo was a music festival held on the grounds of scenic Festge Park in Cross Plains, Wisconsin.  The event is in its second year, though last year's fest was not nearly as successful.  "I think it's because I gave too much responsibility to other people," offers the internet blogger, "Sad Moth Music Fest is best when it is more the product of a singular creative voice.  Like y'know... mine."

I ask him to elucidate what he means by "singular creative voice."  He smiles, leans back in his chair and flips down his super awesome sunglasses with the hinged lenses.  "Well, you see, as someone who appreciates the classics, and understands that most music today is shallow, boring trash, sometimes I feel like I was born in the wrong generation.  I wanted to put something on, one big fest that would save today's music from itself.  It took a lot of hard work.  I really had to do like, a couple hours of work, send a bunch of texts and stuff.  But I think all my hard work really paid off.  People really responded to my fest in a positive way.  I mean, I've always had an outstanding taste in music, but come on!  Sometimes I feel like I've been getting too much praise, if that's even possible!"

The internet blogger has had a grueling schedule in the last few days, jetting across the globe to receive congratulatory gifts from world leaders.  "It's been tough, seeing the world, flying first class,  hearing all these world dignitaries tell me how great I am," he says, flashing his million-dollar smile. "Welp, catch ya on the flipside."  He rises and hits me with the double finger guns.  What a great guy.